Saturday, October 27, 2007
There are some days that I am blessed to be taken back to the important things in life. This week I had one of those days.
I met with a client who thought that aborting her baby was the only option she had. She was living a life of desperation and sadness.
We talked and she cried. I got the opportunity to show her the baby inside of her via ultrasound. There was no manipulation - no magic answers - no problems solved. There was only life - a tiny baby - doing somersaults inside the safety of its mother's womb - a beating heart that in reality is smaller than the eraser on a pencil.
These are the things that are really important - the miracle of a life created - a life that only God can create.
This young woman left with a resolve to give life to the baby inside of her. She did not leave with a plan for her future. She knew that survival would only be possible one day at a time.
We will be there for her. We will help her determine how to relieve some of the issues that have caused the desperation in her life.
Please remember these young women - they need love - they need Jesus - they need a community that will surround them and encourage them to become the woman God has designed them to be.
Friday, October 5, 2007
2. I need to be taught that I have special needs arising from adoption loss, of which I need not be ashamed.
As adoptive parents it is important that we not attempt to deny the needs of adopted children. We really want to believe that our love will conquer all needs and losses in our children's lives. None of us want to believe that our children will have pain as a result of their adoption loss.
On the other hand, we need to be careful not to assume that every need our child exhibits is due to adoption loss. There is a fine line here - giving our children freedom to express their feelings but not creating issues where there are none. It is critical that we help our kids know that their feelings are acceptable and that there is no need for shame.
Some things we can do:
* Provide accurate information to our children about their birthfamilies.
* Create an environment that gives them freedom to talk about their feelings.
* Respect their feelings no matter how illogical they may seem to you.
* Be careful to never make their pain about you. It has to be about them.
* Don't forget that God creates families.
Pray for your children and for their hearts to be healed. Know that God will equip you to be the parent that He has called you to be.