Saturday, June 14, 2008

Adoption = Fear?

Recently we were reunited with a birthmom who placed 2 children 11 and 13 years ago with a loving Christian family. After sacrificing her own desires so that her children could have a family and a life that she felt she could not give them, this adoptive family "disappeared". They have not communicated with her for more than 10 years. They moved and did not inform the agency. It is apparent that they have no intention or desire to have contact with the very woman who gave them a family.
My heart breaks as we hear this woman share the pain and grief of being rejected by the couple who received her children as their own through adoption. She longs to know how her boys are doing - what they look like - what they love to do. It is simple - a letter, some pictures would make a huge difference.
Why does this couple run away from this precious young woman? Is it because they fear her involvement? Do they fear that their boys will love her more than they love them? Have they simply discarded her worth as a birthmother?
How can a couple profess to be Christians and then so easily walk away from the woman who gave them such incredible gifts?
I don't have an answer to these questions but I would love to hear your thoughts.
I am still praying that the Lord will soften the hearts of this couple and stir within them a love for this precious woman - the birthmother of their boys.


Rusty and Jennifer said...

We both know the hurt that I have experienced as well. I don't understand why because I have never been an adoptive parent. But as a birth parent, I can only pray for them. I pray that they know my heart and realize that they do not need to feel intimidated by love for him.
I want all adoptive parents to know that it does not have to be a competition. It is simply MORE people to love and pray for that child!

Feldman Family said...

i will be praying with you for this couple. if they really know Christ, the Holy Spirit can convict them. Praying that they will listen and be obedient, not giving way to any fears.

2Tim1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

If adoptive parents are willing, the Lord can give them a love for the birthmother that cannot be humanly explained.

Help Lord!Let us be faithful to pray.

Donna said...

Wow, that is heartbreaking!! We adopted our two foster children from CPS and I literally hunted down my two children's birth mother (against the advice of CPS)even though she was on drugs and had been for years. Here's that story:

Can't y'all hire someone to find them and make them honor their agreement with New Life?! Arrrgghhh...... so sad!!